Happy Goat Horror

Dark bleatings, my beloved tribe! Today, I’m telling you the odd bits and pieces that I know about The Wicker Man (the 1973 original, not the accidentally hilarious remake starring Nicolas Cage. Though… if you guys want weird Nicolas Cage articles, I’m more than happy to comply – let me know!).

1. Did you know… the producers had to formally apologise?

The Wicker Man was (mostly) filmed in a place called Galloway, in Scotland (I’ve never been there myself but I hear nice, friendly things!). Britt Eickland, who plays Willow in the film, publicly described it as “the bleakest place on Earth”, which offended the locals. A lot.

2. Did you know… those are Rod’s nips, goddamnit!?

Britt Eickland strikes again! I’m totally joking, and in quite a misogynistic way, actually. In all seriousness, this wasn’t at all Eickland’s fault, but her nudity in the film angered her then-boyfriend Rod Stewart. So perturbed was he by the thought of everyone else ogling his girlfriend’s jubblies, that he tried to get the film banned before it was released.

I don’t know why I phrased it like that. I don’t think I’ve ever before said something like “ogling jubblies”. Probably trying to be humorous so I don’t launch into a rant about how women aren’t property, and how insanely overreactive and overdramatic it is to try to go to such lengths as preventing an entire film coming out.

3. Did you know… the Lord is real!

Well, probably not. I just like to be dramatic. However, despite the island and the Lord being fictional, there is a credit that thanks Lord Summerisle and the people of his island. Most likely a joke, some would say, but I like to imagine that they’re out there!

I mean, I don’t know why I like to imagine it. I’m warped and too obsessed with cults, I suppose.

4. Did you know… it was so cold during filming that the actors had to suck ice cubes? Wait.. what?

Sounds insane, and it is. Though the film took place during May, it was actually shot during October and November, which are cold months in the UK. Especially in Scotland, way up North. Obviously, the cast weren’t dressed for winter and it was so cold when they shot the outdoor scenes that you could see everyone’s breath – an issue onscreen. To counter this, they had everyone sucking ice cubes before their scenes so their mouths would be good and cold, and not steamy!

5. Did you know… there are like, a million slightly different versions of the film?

The original negative went missing before the film was completely finished and so there are many versions of varying length. There’s a theory that it could well be lining the M3 motorway because – of all things – hundreds of film canisters were used as road filler during its construction.

I personally think that either Lord Summerisle was messing with the film folk, or Rod Stewart had something to do with it!

So there you have it, some weird trivia! If you know any juicy little freakish facts about this film, let me know! Anything that makes The Wicker Man even more bizarre is welcome information!