Ah, Founders Day—a horror film that somehow manages to check off all the boxes without adding anything remotely memorable. It’s like someone threw together every small-town slasher trope, blended it with some half-hearted mystery, and then put it in a blender on “low.” And, voilà, we get a movie that’s as generic as it gets. But hey, it’s still a movie, so I’m giving it a 6.5.
“The past never stays buried.”
The Premise
The plot? Oh, it’s a classic. A quaint little town celebrating its annual Founders Day festival—except, surprise! There’s a long-forgotten secret that someone is determined to bring back to the surface. And by “someone,” I mean the person with the most predictable motives. You’d think the town might have figured this one out, considering how often secrets seem to haunt these festivals. This isn’t so much a whodunnit as a “you’ll figure it out in five minutes”.
“Some traditions are better left in the past.”
The Execution
The characters? As interesting as soggy toast. Our main protagonist, played by an actress who’s probably still waiting for the script to give her something to work with, stumbles through the plot trying to unravel a mystery that was already solved in the first 15 minutes. There’s an attempt at character development, but really, it’s all just there to fill time until the next jump scare—or should I say attempted jump scare?
The performances are… fine. Everyone’s going through the motions, just trying to get their paycheck. The town itself is your typical “small-town, big secrets” setting, which is fine if you like the flavor of stale clichés. The cinematography does its best, but it can only work with the utterly predictable material it’s been given.
“Some horrors can’t be kept in the dark.”
The Horror Elements
Let’s talk about the horror, shall we? Because Founders Day isn’t so much a horror film as it is a paint-by-numbers slasher with a few half-hearted twists thrown in to make you think it’s clever. The killer’s identity is about as well-hidden as a neon sign, and by the time we get to the big reveal, you’ll be more annoyed at how long it took the characters to catch on than scared.
There are attempts at scares—shadows in the background, the ominous music, the occasional creepy mask—but all of it feels like a retread of a thousand other films. I mean, at least try to disguise the clichés with something a little less obvious, right? It’s as if the filmmakers decided to just throw every haunted house, creepy woods, and mysterious town trope in a blender and press “play.”
“Some things are better left unsaid.”
Final Thoughts
At the end of the day, Founders Day doesn’t have the chops to stand out in the overcrowded world of slasher flicks. It’s not outright terrible, but it’s definitely not worth remembering once the credits roll. If you’re looking for a generic slasher with nothing new to offer, this movie will fit the bill. Just don’t expect to be impressed or even remotely scared. Instead, you’ll be left wondering if it was just a really long, mildly suspenseful episode of Scooby-Doo.
Strengths
• Classic small-town horror setup that’s familiar and cozy, if you’re into that
• Decent production value for a run-of-the-mill slasher
Weaknesses
• Lack of originality—this is a slasher template with a side of “meh”
• Predictable plot and characters that barely rise above paper-thin
Score: 6.5 – It’s generic, predictable, and not at all groundbreaking, but if you like your slasher films easy to digest, Founders Day will pass the time.
Happy Goat Horror 
Leave a comment