Happy Goat Horror

Dark bleetings!

Listen, I know the show ended 9 years ago so this post is possibly a bit late, but I still love True Blood (mostly), and I’ll never stop laughing at the scene where Eric gets drunk on fae blood, slaps Sookie’s butt, and then runs off yelling for her to chase him.

For the most part, the show went over pretty well with its audience, though lots are in agreement that it sort of lost its way towards the end. And yeah, the crux of the plot usually revolved around Sookie in some sort of love triangle (or square), which was easily the least interesting part of the whole thing. However, it also gave us savage vampires, oceans of splattering blood, and gore galore.

And of course… these fine folk! Here are my 10 favourite True Blood characters.

I love these characters for the same reason so I’ve lumped them together because I couldn’t pick between them. The reason I love them is not because I actually “love” them, but because I find them both terrifying. They are utter lunatics, and every time one of them is on screen, I’m frightened for whichever human characters are unfortunate enough to be in the room with them. They’re both so unhinged and unpredictable and that’s why they’re so scary to me. I think they’re great mini-bosses and characters for this type of show.

I’ll tell you upfront that I was pretty mad at her for certain decisions that she made later in the show, but I adored her when she was first introduced. The bratty teenage phase that Bill had to put up with was hilarious, and she had some really unique problems to solve. I thought her character arc was one of the best, and she grew so much.

The most classically naive and innocent person in the show, probably. He was so sweet and so good to Arlene, and when a certain scene rolled around, I was balling my eyes out.

Few characters are more badass than Tara. Her home struggles were heartbreaking and the actor absolutely smashed the nuances of dealing with her mother. She’s the most loyal friend on the planet, and I love her depth. I’ve never been so mad at a show for how they ended her story. OFF SCREEN FFS. The writers did her dirty.

Another absolute sweetheart and he was perfect for Lafayette. This relationship is easily the one I was most invested in throughout the show. He’s selfless and brave, and I just love him.

I simply cannot understand why Ginger isn’t in everyone’s Top 10. She’s frickin’ hilarious. The more I learned of her backstory, the more I hoped that she would somehow be the last person standing at the end, complete with riches and all her dreams coming true. She’s a minor character that doesn’t show up in even half the episodes, and yet I’m pretty sure I remember all of her scenes. Ginger rules!

You can’t have a list of favourites without including Eric. He’s an absolute savage. I was conflicted about him most of the time because how dare he do that to Lafayette, but also, he’s really funny. In fiction, a lot of heinous characters seem to get a pass because they’re funny. Don’t get me wrong, I’d never want to bump into him in a dark alley, but I’ll happily munch popcorn as I observe him from the safe end of the TV, wondering what the hell he might do next.

Russell, in my opinion, is one of the greatest TV villains of all time. He’s Loretta and Franklin dialled up to a thousand, but scarier than both of them combined because he’s mostly sane… until he starts carrying around and talking to that urn. Crazy villains doing unimaginable evil is one thing, but sane characters doing things like ripping out spines on live TV is quite another. I never knew what this dude was up to, how far he’d go, who he might slaughter, etc. He had me on the edge of my seat for his whole run, whether or not he was even onscreen. I think one of my favourite things about True Blood is the vampires and the rules surrounding them. Typically, vampires are always depicted as super strong and fast, and very hard to hurt or kill, but this show really amps up these elements, whilst also throwing other details in (like nest mentally, for example). Having a villain like Russell who could rip every human’s head off within seconds, and also every vampire’s, was priceless. All hail King Russell!

Of course Lafayette is in the Top 2. He’s amazing. He’s smart and sassy and layered, has a journey of self-discovery, a complicated relationship with love, and has the best comebacks and insults. And weed. He also knows himself better than anyone else, and doesn’t allow the assholes in his town to kick him around. He’s so cool. Of all human characters, he is easily the one I care about the most. Words can never truly describe how absolutely awesome Lafayette is.

Speaking of absolutely awesome, I give you Pam. She’s a legend and I love her. At first, I loved her for her her dry wit, her no bs approach, and her general fabulousness. Her sense of glamour and style, and the way she carries herself had me wishing I was her (except for the small matter of the blood drinking – gross). Then, as I learned more about her, I loved her for overcoming her past without being ashamed of it, and her absolute love and devotion to Eric that (thank you True Blood) wasn’t based on a jealous, romantic infatuation, but a deeper bond of complete trust and friendship. The way this show explored love through Pam was just magical to me, and I was initially only invested in the show for all the limbs being ripped off and the terrified screaming. She is the ultimate boss, the ultimate woman, the ultimate, best ever True Blood character.

Who’s your favourite? Tell me your thoughts!