Happy Goat Horror

The Regal Retreat is an exclusive resort situated deep in the countryside of East Anglia where the rich and famous go to unwind. However, far from being a place of rest and relaxation, bad things happen there. Its history has been plagued by tragedy and misfortune. Over the years there have been scores of killing sprees, accidents, suicides, and even the occasional sighting of the resident ghost.

In a desperate attempt to save the business, the resort calls in paranormal investigator Ben Shivers. Since the devastating loss of his daughter and the subsequent breakdown of his marriage, he has been traveling Europe in a vintage VW camper van with his sidekick, a rescue cat called Mr. Trimble. He sees the assignment as the perfect opportunity to break the cycle of self-destruction he has been on, but as he delves into the case, he uncovers a history many would rather forget—sordid family secrets, witchcraft, murder, and an ancient curse, all coming together in a perfect storm deep in the heart of the English countryside.

Welcome to the Regal Retreat.

Dark bleatings, my lovely tribe. The Wretched Bones is great. Sorry for the spoiler on my opinion upfront there… I normally like to amble my way to my overall judgment, but it just has to be said that this book is great.

To quickly summarise the plot without spoilers: Ben Shivers, PI (Paranormal Investigator) has a cat sidekick, and they’re hired to investigate a posh resort because murders and deaths keep happening there. The cat doesn’t really do anything – I don’t want to be misleading – but I mentioned it because it’s always worth mentioning a cat. There’s an older couple called Marjorie and Ronald, and I was probably too invested in them. Ben makes a friend called Tim, and while on-site, a new fresh death happens. Meanwhile, we’re flitting to and from the past to a woman called Elizabeth, who may or may not have been a witch.

I’m not a fan of mysteries, generally. I find them a bit of a snooze. Not this one, though. Ben Shivers is a funny protagonist, with a way with words and a way with people. He felt like a real person, but also like someone who could be played by Leslie Nielson if the character was older. He’s had more than his share of tragedy but the way the author handles this gives it the edge it deserves, whilst also not bringing the tone of the whole story down to somewhere super heavy. It’s quite amazing how light it feels, all things considered, which was a very welcome tonal choice and perfect for a book like this.

I also really enjoyed that the story was told in a way so that we’re alternating between the present, and 400 years in the past. For a while, it’s not precisely clear why this is being done, but then in the third act the two timelines are married together beautifully. I guessed some details and was pleasantly surprised by others.

It’s a really fun read, honestly quite top-notch, and was a delight to experience. I’d recommend this to people who enjoy horror genre blends, characters you’d love to have a pint with, and fans of supernatural mysteries. If you’d like to check out the book or author, there are some links below for you:

THE WRETCHED BONES

C.M. SAUNDERS

Bleeeeat!